Carriea31 (carriea31) wrote,
Carriea31
carriea31

Decisions..

I hate when I am faced with a decision that I don't know how to make, or that I don't want to have to make. I'm in that position now and it is just terrible. There are (obviously) lots of details involved here that I haven't gone in to, but to make a long story very short, I have had a trip scheduled for relief work for months with a group. Tickets are purchased, plans are being made, etc. Then a thing came up with my son and it has made me uneasy...today that situation resolved itself, but in the meantime, my coworker quit at work, and so if I take the trip then there is a huge gap for a week because there is no one else to cover me currently. I am being pulled in every direction. My boss doesn't want me to go, my husband does and then doesn't, I do and then don't, and ultimately I feel like a failure. Everyone involved gives a different opinion...I feel like what I want just simply doesn't matter at this point, but beyond that...I don't even know what I do want anymore! I just want to do the right thing but no matter what I do, someone else gets let down and I detest that. I like to fix other people's problems, not make them worse. I've been feeling quite down in the dumps about this for about a month and I'm very tired of it.

I just started reading the Hiding Place by Corrie ten Boom. Seems like an excellent book so far although I know that there will be parts of it that are terribly sad. I like reading books about people from history.

Recently have watched a few episodes of the show Malcolm in the Middle. Never thought that looked like something I would enjoy, but I do find that I am liking it lots. It has a lot of sarcastic humor, which I really appreciate.
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